Shannon Doherty:
Uh, do we have the right place?
Rose McGowan:
A man is here, he needs to DIE!
Holly Marie Combs:
Shannon, don’t try to talk to her, she’s determined to kill every guy who even thought about her and Alyssa, remember we placate her enough until we get her in the nut… (Thunderous boom is heard as lightning cracks the sky which sends the Cauldron flying through the sky)
Alyssa Milano:
Okay, obviously this is not normal! (Cut to James in his Halloween shirt as he holds the Sword of Caliverti up and lightning striking it and chanting in an unknown tongue as electricity engulfs James Faraci. Cut to Rose McGowan as she tries to attack James screaming “DIE MALE SCUM DIE!” repeatedly until a wayward bolt knocks her out. Cut to Shannon Doherty, Alyssa Milano and Holly Marie Combs as they look and see James)
Holly Marie Combs:
That is not the target I think Rose had in mind! HEY YOU! (Cut to James as he puts the sword down and the lightning no longer engulfs him and James acts normally)
TLOTA:
Yes! (Cut to Shannon, Alyssa, Holly and a recently revived Rose.)
Rose McGowan:
Why are we not killing him?
Alyssa Milano:
Maybe it’s not the target we’re after.
Rose McGowan:
He’s a man! HE MUST DIE! He sent me a message.
Alyssa Milano:
Wait, everyone check for this guy’s e-mail address. What is it? (James Hands the ladies his E-Mail Address and the four look for his E-Mail Address) “A Countdown”? (Cut to Shannon Doherty)
Shannon Doherty:
“Top 13”
Rose McGowan:
“Because The Power of three added to ten gives the list a little extra power”
Holly Marie Combs:
“Spoilers will happen and I will be mentioning Obscurus Lupa a lot in the list”? Who’s Obscurus Lupa (A voice mocking Holly Marie Combs’s voice repeats what she just said. Cut to James)
TLOTA:
That would be Lupa! (Cut to Obscurus Lupa as she comes from out of nowhere)
Obscurus Lupa:
And you four have been nothing if not a gigantic pain in my ass outside of a bald headed prick that needs to get his ass kicked. (Cut to Rose McGowan)
Rose McGowan:
Give me ten minutes and where he is and I can make it look like a justifiable homicide! (Cut to Obscurus Lupa has a look on the face with the thought of “Maybe I should let her know where he is.” James says “Lupa!”)
Obscurus Lupa:
It was a thought. (Cut to Alyssa Milano)
Alyssa Milano:
Okay, we’re so off track right now. So let’s try to see what you were asking about. You wanted to talk about the Top 13 Episodes of “Charmed” (Cut to James and Lupa)
TLOTA:
That’s right. (Cut to Shannon Doherty)
Shannon Doherty:
And half of the list will be from my tenure. (Cut to Rose McGowan)
Rose McGowan:
And Half from my tenure? (Cut to James)
TLOTA:
Yes and Yes there will be spoilers. All I need was your consent to do it. The rational person would either say yes or no! Not set up a coven to wipe me off the face of the earth! I mean yeah I’ve had bad experiences doing these types of countdowns. I had the Power Rangers go after me when I dealt with their series and last year Chai Romruen-Hansen went after me I think, not only for a retrospective I did in the summer of 2017 but also for a “What I wanted to see in the H2O/Mako Mermaids Movie” editorial last year! So do you say, can I do my countdown? (Cut to Shannon Doherty, Alyssa Milano and Rose McGowan)
Shannon Doherty:
Can we talk it over amongst ourselves. HOLLY! (Cut to Holly Marie Combs as she speaks and Lupa repeats her mocking Holly’s voice until finally Holly decides to mock Lupa’s voice leading to Lupa mocking Holly Marie Combs’ voice mocking her own voice! Shannon, Alyssa and Rose shout “STOP FEEDING INTO HER AND GET OVER HERE!” Holly Marie Combs walks away as the four talk in a huddled up position. Cut to James and Obscurus Lupa)
TLOTA:
Lupa, Why do you always rile your prey?
Obscurus Lupa:
What do you mean?
TLOTA:
You basically goaded Holly Marie Combs into mocking your voice and then you made yourself sound dumb and that’s the last thing you are.
Obscurus Lupa:
Well thanks James-Bama for thinking so highly of me! Say if I ever do a “Movie Nights” what movies would you like me to check out?
TLOTA:
Well there are quite a few. I wrote them down in a list.
Obscurus Lupa:
Thank you oh wait, I think they’ve come to a decision. (Cut to the four as Rose McGowan walks to James)
Rose McGowan:
Okay, were it up to me I would only say “Yes” if I were to beat you to death and cover myself in your blood and other fluids! But since the others have as much say as I do, we all agree, You can do your funny little “Top 13” but know that if you do something stupid ever again, you…are…DEAD! (Rose McGowan walks away James turns towards his studio, Sighs then Rose McGowan runs up and tries to beat the living man-crap out of him!)
Getting their permission was the easy part, the hard part? Doing this Top 13
