TLOTA: I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and it’s…. (James slams his fists and a green and red hypnowheel pops up and James’ head is in the center as Christmas based imagery is around the border of the screen and a metal instrumental version of “Jingle Bells” play in the background.)
TLOTA (Singing to the tune of “Jingle Bells”): CHRISTMAS TIME! CHRISTMAS TIME! CHRISTMAS TIME AGAIN! LOTS OF FUN FOR EVERYONE FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED TEN! CHRISTMAS TIME! CHRISTMAS TIME! IT’S TIME TO MAKE THE ROOM! FOR THE MOVIES, SPECIALS AND EVERYTHING ELSE UNTIL WE GO KA-BOOM! (An explosion occurs as it cuts to James’ office door and Eliza Dushku opens the door)
Eliza Dushku: WHAT IS GOING ON IN THIS PLACE?! (Cut to James sitting back up with his hair looking like Georgio A. Tsoukalos with red and green stripes in it.)
TLOTA: Well it’s the holidays and in a few hours my family and friends in the Reviewerverse are gonna be here and I figured I’d get my review in before the party gets into full swing. (Cut to Eliza Dushku at the door.)
Eliza Dushku: Well have you looked at yourself in a mirror recently? (Cut to James)
TLOTA: No. Why? (Cut to Eliza)
Eliza Dushku: Take a look! (Eliza grabs a mirror and shows James his new hairdo)
TLOTA: YOWZA! (James shakes his head until his hair looks normal except for the red and green) Better? (Cut to Eliza)
Eliza Dushku: The Red and Green look wicked festive on you! (Cut to James)
TLOTA: Thanks. So how about you come and sit with me and help me on this? (Cut to Eliza)
Eliza Dushku: Uh, No, I’ve got to help everyone else get ready, but you know it’s kind of wicked easy seeing as how 95 % of the work was done already, all we have to do is reheat the food and set up the buffet. You do a lot for us. Thanks James. (Cut to James)
TLOTA: No problem. So while you’re finalizing the little bits and pieces for the party, I’m gonna celebrate by watching the Muppets’ version of “It’s a Wonderful Life” (James turns his head to the left in confusion then to the right in confusion before looking at the audience.)
TLOTA: Wait! What?!
A Muppet version of “It’s a Wonderful Life”! What could go wrong? Find out here
