Fic Or Original: Original
Genre(s): Science Fiction/Romance
Rating: T (as according to fictionpress)
Characters In Chapter: Samara Crichton, Nazilla, Kered, Iraca
Relationship(s): Samara Crichton/Nazilla, Nazilla/Glau
I had been trying to figure out Glau for countless days before we had gone to Iraca. I had poured over everything that I knew and used my advanced senses to examine Glau. I thought that Iâ€™d be the only one to figure her out, but Iraca was doing a good job.
I had been watching her for hours as she tried to pretend to be calm. I knew Kered had probably told her his very biased opinion of me. Every now and again she would speak up, as if having an M-4 behind her wasnâ€™t anything to worry about.
â€œSo you resisted your own programming to rejoin Karma?â€ Iraca asked in one of her many attempts to sound calm.
â€œYes.â€ I replied simply.
â€œAnd you resisted for your girlfriend?â€
â€œYes, she was the one thing that I could hold onto. The only thought that, well, kept me human. If it wasnâ€™t for her Iâ€™d probably still be helping The Net.â€
â€œWouldnâ€™t you prefer that as youâ€™d be around more of your kind?â€
â€œMachines are not my kind. My kind is Karma and the humans that live on Earth. I feel no special bond between fellow Machines. No matter what you, Kered, and the others think: it was my humanity that saved me. I have more humanity than you think.â€
â€œSo youâ€™re completely human?â€
â€œThere have beenâ€¦changes, but Iâ€™ll always have my humanity.â€
As I looked at the M-3â€™s body I felt a shiver go through my systems. It wasnâ€™t like I was looking at just another Machine, it was like I was looking at the body of my own kin. I tried to clear my mind of that thought. I was human no matter what.
â€œAre you sure you want to keep your humanity?â€ Iraca finally said.
â€œYes.â€ I replied with more certainty than I felt.
I couldnâ€™t let her see my weakness. She couldnâ€™t think that Iâ€™d turn into a complete Machine. But what if I could fully embrace that side without abandoning Karma? Could I stay a good person if I let my humanity go?
Looking at Glau I knew that if I abandoned humanity I would go to her for comfort. She had a human side and Machine side. If both were able to co-exist, sheâ€™d be in the same situation as I was. Maybe she could be my rock while I was in utter confusion.
But what about Samara?
I watched her for a few more hours and then started to prepare dinner. Maybe if I treated Iraca special then that initial kindness would be back. It wouldnâ€™t be a special dinner, but it would be something. As I started getting the ingredients for a sandwich out I heard familiar footsteps.
â€œSamara.â€ I said.
â€œYou donâ€™t eat.â€ Samara said as she walked over to me. â€œKered or Iraca?â€
â€œIraca. Iâ€™m certain that Kered would disable me if I attempted to give him anything. Probably blame me for trying to assassinating him.â€
Samara gave me a small grin.
â€œThatâ€™s probably true. He doesnâ€™t trust you at all, thinks that youâ€™ll turn on us one day. That you are incapable of experiencing love.â€ She replied.
â€œWhat do you think?â€ I asked as I started to make the sandwich.
â€œI think you can love butâ€¦youâ€™ve changed a lot. Iâ€™ve tried to ignore how youâ€™ve changed butâ€¦I canâ€™t now. Things have just become worse.â€
â€œWhat do you mean? I still love you, Samara.â€
â€œYou call me Samara. You say The Net. Youâ€™ve changed. Hell, you even rescued a Machine.â€
â€œI was doing that be-â€œ
â€œDonâ€™t, Naz, just donâ€™t. I know itâ€™s because you have feelings for it. It has the skin of my dead ex-girlfriend and you treat it like a person. It almost feels like-â€œ
â€œI love her more than you? Samara, I would never kill you even if you betrayed all of Karma. I feel nothing like that towards Glau. I feel no deep connection like that to her.â€
â€œBut you want to.â€
I couldnâ€™t argue with Samaraâ€™s assessment and I was confused about that. I should be able to argue this point logically. It was a logical thing to argue about. Why couldnâ€™t I?
â€œI know you want to or else you wouldnâ€™t have rescued her. You like to say that youâ€™re logical now, but you do have emotions. Maybe youâ€™re just so removed from your emotions that you canâ€™t recognize new ones.â€ Samara said.
â€œI can recognize new emotions.â€ I said, but I didnâ€™t know if I was being honest or not. â€œI could tell if I felt something like love for her. Maybe youâ€™re just trying to twist things into your version of what things should be. Maybe youâ€™ve talked to Kered for too long.â€
After I said those things I wished that I hadnâ€™t. Samaraâ€™s expression looked more shocked than when I had come to her after I had been made a Machine. I wanted to take what I had said back, but I knew I couldnâ€™t. Both because I couldnâ€™t change time and my words were exactly what I had meant.
â€œYou think that I let what Kered says get to me?â€ Samara finally managed to ask. â€œI love you, Naz, truly and deeply. I would never let what that bastard says affect my feelings for you. He doesnâ€™t think youâ€™re human anymore, but I think you still are. Itâ€™s just that I worry how human you are nowadays.â€
I heard Keredâ€™s cough and our conversation was over.
â€œI received some new intel, Samara, I need you to catalog it.â€ He said and Samara nodded.
With a final angry glance at me, she walked away. I was left with Kered watching me as I made the sandwich. Each movement I made was scrutinized by the Elemental. I guess he was making sure I wouldnâ€™t poison Iraca.
There were no words exchanged by us, but we didnâ€™t need words to communicate now. I could clearly tell that he would like any excuse to deactivate me.
I felt free when I finished the sandwich and walked over to Iraca to give it to her.