Issued .04

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Dear diary;

We had just moved in the neighborhood and all ready the look of resentment is seen all over the faces of some of the other tenants in the building. I don’t understand. We are there some much hatred toward my people? Why. Do they look at us like the devil when it is them who give use the hate mail and paint nasty picture on our door? Farther had told use that there are disobedient and it was best to stay close to our own kind and not to deal with anyone who do not believe what we believe. This was easier said than done for I am Jewish and most of the people living in this part of the neighborhood are Irish, Chinese, and Italian there are even a few color people who lived a mile away from here but no one that was Jewish live here. I guessed that why lot of people was shock and angry to see use here, and not in a Jewish neighborhood.

Dear diary;

I cannot believe what some of the neighborhood kids had told me. Or in this case what some of their parents had told them it enough to make me sick to my stomach. And I had to use pre will power not to puch that little bitch in the face and might have if I did not fear getting a beating my both mother and farther. But even they at some point would understand my angry if I would had told them what had been said to me. yes I did not told them. I have my reason not to tell them of course. And yet the more I thing about wht hd been said to me the more I ask myself if this is the reason why my father want me to be with people with my own kind?

I guess you wonder what was said to me that got me so work up. Well I’ll tell you. It has do with the reason why so many people hates use so much. Mindy, who live two door from use has told me that Jewish people are nothing but money grubbing People who is taken job for them self and is one of the reason why things are what they are now. Do you know how angry that made me? Mindy sure as hell notice it and had said it what her father had told her. That some of the othe children had gather around and repeated the same thing. I held my honor, and told them all if us Jew has all this money and is take jobs than why the hell am I here; living in the sums of the big apple? When none of no one give me an answered, I simply just walk away and head back home. Yet sitting here in the bathroom I could not help but wonder why people would even thing that all Jewish people are rich, greedy and is taken jobs from everyone else. As a Jewish girl I had never seen any money handed to my family in way. In fact it was the opperaents. My family is poor. We don’t drive around the city in fancy car. We don’t own any big business or had people severing us left and right. And the job my dad works in hardly pay the bill. So I ask again; why are so many people think were the one who is taken all the money and jobs in this country? I guest for now it’s a question I will never get answered.

Dear diary;

I had made up my mind. Not even dad could change it. I am going to look for a job. It won’t be easy but after seeing the landlord face when he was told by my dad he did not had all the rent money there really no choose in the matter. Yes he is stern when it come this subject; women job is in the home. Yet I neve understand or expected the phillousitiy. And unlike my mother who accepted what many had told her about that a women place this world. Sorry not me. I have ambitions. I have dreams. Yes I do want to get married some day and have children, but I don’t feel I should give up my dream to do it, let alone give up most of my freedom to a man. Yes I am a Jewish girl. But I am independent girl no less.

Dear diary;

As you might expected I had told the new to my parents about me looking for work and no surprise my father did not take it so well. in fact mama had to stop him for wiping me. I had to admit I never seen him so angry before and god only knew what he had had done if mama have not got in the way. A part of me wonders why. Most of the time she would take his side on almost all of his decision so seeing coming between us had shock both me and even my father who stared to scream on her for what he called her act of disobedient. As for me I stood my ground. And give them a reason why it was import that someone other them just him needed to work. My father face turn red with anger but before he had a change to say anything I ran out of the apartment. Walking down the crowed street of china town I could not help but thinking how stupid it was tlakin g back to my father like that. I mean my heart was beating uncontrollably and my hand was tumbling in fear. Yes he is my farther and I know he love my dearly but that dose not mean he does not have a dark side when his rules are broken. Yet this is a rule that has to be broken I am tired of seeing my mother crying alone in the room. I am tired of seeing my dad’s when he come home with just a loaf of bread some riches and few can good that suppose to last use the whole week. I am tired seeing the landlord treating to throw use of into the street whenever the rent is passed due. We need to eat we need to roof on our heads. We need to live.

Dear diary;

Yes I am still alive. Dad did not beat me the moment I walk in the do in fact he did not say anything but look at me sternly before looking over the some of the overdue bill that was scattered all over the table. Not wanted to start other fight I simply walk toward the bed room where both my brothers and sisters ahd ran over toward me and hugged me on sight. It felt good knowing I was mess but I also flet bad for ther really thought I had ran way from home. Ah well , what done is done, and now I need to focused on looking for work . I thing I will start with the Brooklyn for what I understand there same fctory ewho had girls my age working I wha they called the assimberly line. So I will start looking there. who knows might land something that vary same day.

Dear diary;

Yess !Yess! I am now an employed woman. Like I told you Yesterday there are some factories that hired girls my age to worked the assembler line in Brooklyn well I went to one of them today, and after talking to one of the bosses for about fifteen minutes he had hired me on the spot. When I told Parent and to my surprise there seem happy. Well more mother then father. She was not angry. In fact he smiles once I had told them the news. Yet there was a look of sadness on his face as he smocked on his pipe and process to read the daily news paper. Yet this new did not come with put some rules yes there are cnsiction I had to follow for mother told me I was not a little girl anymore. Hum I found that funny scent my child hood had pretty much ended when I turn 9. The condition was reasonable and that is I still had to help round the house with the food as cleaning and help mother take care of my brother and sisters. It is reasonable considering I have been doing that anyway. The important part is that now my family will have more money to work with and less worries as to where our next meal is coming from.

Dear diary;

Now I know why they called it work and yes I did work 14 hours in fact and my feet is killing me. And that not including the work I have to do at home. But enough about that you properly want to know what do in this new job of mine. Well it’s threading. That right it a swing factory bt it not the kind of swing you use to seeing your mother doing on her little machine, no, this involve big fabric and bight machine that me along with other girls are line up side by side to make it work. It should easy right? Wrong, in fact it is hell. We had to stand for long hour of the day in our bear feet. Yes none of us are allow to wear any shoe while working. They clam working in our bear feet keep us alert. Yha standing bear feet for 14 hours with only a ten minute break in between. Hum I am sure there is a better why for use to work with counseling use any pain. But that the job I sign up for. If I want to keep It I best no to complain about to my parents.

Dear diary:

I have just found out just how dangerous factory work really is. With in the last two day tree girls had gotten hurt while trying to place sowing two fabric together their had court in the machine resulting in the fingers getting stitch in with it. the scream along mad my hair in the back of my neck stand in attention. What worse is I had never seen throw girls again after that. Just like that some new one had taken there place the very next day and the way everyone is acting you would thing these girls had never worked her at all. This disburse me but again this what I sign up for and dipitethe way they treat us I have to remember that my family needs the money.

Dear diary;

It had been a while scent my last log but when working day after day for long hours can really take it troll on a woman. In fact it was becoming more trading that mother had to cut some of my workload just so I can get enough sleep. S for the pay it is not much; 42 dollars a week in fact but it dose help pay the bill and put more food on the table. Pulse dad is finally started to catch up on the rent and that is a good thing. I just wish the Landlord would start to fix some of the things in this place for time to time.

Dear diary;

You are not going to believe this but some Irish boy was trying to sweet talk me. Yes I, a Jewish girl was getting hit on by touch guy. Of course he is no stranger to me. he lives one floor down form me and hung outside our building. He always with company and not the good one if I may ask what crazy is out of all the girls who live in the building he seem to have his eyes on me. dose he not understand that I’m Jewish and my kind do not get along with them. just as I was heading in the building he stood right In fort of me and inducing himself as James St Patrick. And grip my hand as if I was his wife. I bless but quickly pull my hand away from him as he smiles at me and I glair angrily at him. A couple of his friend had tried to gang up on me. Saying things like Jewish don’t have a thing for us fighting Irish guys. I simply smile and said looks can be deceiving yet not in that way. The boy St. Patrick smile and let me by but yelled out saying that I did what I say before I clam the stair heading toward the third floor.

Hum the nerve of that guy hitting on me and putting words in my mouth. He really thinks I am in to him. Yet… why can’t I stop thinking of him.

Dear diary;

That boy had done it again the moment I had walk outside. He approach me in an attempt to get my attention only this time he was alone. He was still trying to be a tough guy yet there was another side to him that surprises me. still I was gonna let my guard down I simple keep the meeting formal and head n my busy while at the same time blushing at the fact this good looking guy was trying so hard to talk to me. My God, did I say good looking. What’s coming over me?

Dear diary;

I saw that boy, St Patrick hanging outside our building again only it was midnight and look on his face told me he was up to no good. I know I shouldn’t give it any thought. It none of my business what he do with his life yet a part of me cannot help but worried that he way over his head. Yes I admit it, I am worry for him. I know I shouldn’t, not because he is Irish but because he think he’s untouchable. And that kind of thinking can land anyone in jail or worse dead. Just ask my parents. We had lost so many people in our home land on the count they though nothing could harm them. Steve, God do I miss you. Five minutes had passed and Patrick friends had met up him in a way that told me they about go leave but before they did David had look directly at me. His face looked said; uncertain as to the path he was about to take. I wanted to yell out to him, but all I end up doing was wave at him as his friends pulled him away and rain down the busy street.

Dear diary;

The moment I saw him I let have it. I told me it was stupid of him going out of the dead of night. Of course his friends tried to jump in to defend there action but I was not gonna hear it I let them all have it, every signal one of them. I guess my angered had made an impact because not one of them had give a replied in fact they seem to have like that fact that a Jewish girl can speak their mine as well as hold their own. It was cut short of course. Father had saw the commotion from the window and demanded me up stairs. He them scroll me for even talking to them for they was no good people and that I should stay away from their kind. Not wanted to ague I just head to wash up a change to my house cloth. And while helping mother prepare diner a part of me keep thinking about David and what the hell he was up to doing the dead of nights. I also was thing the last thing he had said to me before I head upstairs. It was no one of throw force or half hearted apologies, no it was sensors. He really did not mean to anger me. And that alone told that he not all hr made himself out to be. Now if only he show that every day. On second thought no I don’t want him to show his nice side. Again what is coming over me?

Dear dairy;

I had just found out why David and his friend had took off doing the dead of night and now I feel so stupid. It appears that Davids and his friend had befriends a colored boy who was in hot water some of the neighborhood gang members. Realizing they was attack both the boy and his family, both James and his friend had toward the color neighborhood of Harlem. I don’t know what happen to them but what I do know is they manage to get to the boy in time. I was shock when one of the girlfriends had told me this and yet I was happy that James was concern for someone other than himself. It also proves that not everyone that is not our own kind is bad people. I just hope I hear more of the good thing about David than bad.

Dear dairy;

Let me start off right now in saying it was not a date. I bump into David and we went to a diner for a quick lunch. That’s it, no more, no less. Yes we talk, and yes I had a good time and yes some on looker had watch at use in both surprise and anger at the sight of a Irish boy and a Jewish girl eating together, but did not care. We are friends’ yes James is my friend. And there is nothing wrong with being friend with a person who does not believe in the same religion as you. In fact I had found out we had more in common then I thought. His demeanor had also change he was sweet, kind and good listeners. That some I did not expect yet the more we talked the more I wanted to spine time with him. Bugt it meadn nothing were friends, just friends.

Dear Diary

Yes we are having lunch again so what. We are friends. what friends can’t go out every now and then. I am not a child you know and it not like I am goi gto do something the going to put dishonor to both me and my family. so no worried it just a date Humm lunch.

Dear Diary

My God he did he really did it. He’d kiss me. It was my first kiss and I am guilty to say I really like it. It was soft and plastid and I did not want him to stop. I was not keen on him slipping his tough in my mouth but I got used to it over time. I do not know how long we had been kissing each other but I came to my scentes and pulled away from him in shock before a run as fast I can home. What have I done I have kissed a boy I am not bound to. And what’s worse I really did not want him o stop. This is not right. I shouldn’t have done that with David. he might get it in his head that I am easy and want to take things further. I can’t let that happen. I must protect my honor and not let people think that am some slut they can take advantage of me. I can’t and I will not see David again. And that that.

Dear Dairy

It’s been two weeks scenes I had seen or spoken to David and yet I cannot spot thinking of him. Why? Why can’t I get that bad boy out of my mine? I I ionre him when he calls out to me. I stay with I make sure I never seen alone but with friends who to dose not like him. Yet even after all that I still can’t keep my mine off of him. Why? Why does this boy affect me so much? I’m a good Jewish girl, yet it this bad boy why got my head spinning. I need to do something, but what? It only the answer was so clear.

Dear Diary

I geust you are not surprise that both me and David talk and yes we talked a lot. It was hated and than it was not and it ending in us agreeing to take thing slow. No we re not dating. But we are seeing each other none the less. I know it does not make scene. But that the way it has to be, for if thing does not work out there will be no hard feeling between us.

Dear Diary;

David is trying way too hard to impress me he show up in my job with a bag of lunch and smile. Even throw him showing up in my job could landed both me and him in trouble I was happy to see. Of course that was cut short when my supervisor had yelled at him to the point it they almost came to blow. in fact it did it was scary yet exciting at the same time to see my man holding his own. My god did I say my man?

Dear Diary;

Oaky now my job had lock the door form the outside and won’t open them until of sufft done. Why? Is it because of what had happen yesterday? And even so what would it solve? This is supposed to be a job, not a prison. I have a bad feeling about this.

Dear Diary;

Today I did something daring. So daring that not even david did not see it coming. I took him to the other over the brig toward Park Slope why you may ask well I work only a few mile from the bother line it because no one know me of David there it was a great place to have some time to ourself with no disproving eye looking at us .lead him to an old tree house that was bluld around the a playground. Of coruse David was not impressed at frist. He did not feel key on being in a neighborhood where ne did not know anyone or he did not flet welcome. Yet all that change once we entered the tree house. there we tlak and than we kissed for a very long time it was amazing. His lips on mine and the way he had hold me tightly made me feel safe. Of course I had to stop kissing him because his hand was all over me and once he tired to feel up my legs all the way up my dress I had to pull away. Sorry we are not married and I my honor is something I hold dear to me as well as to my belive. Yet I was not angry not in the less. In fact I could not had been happier in my life. he only problem is I am a Jewish girl expecting to be with a Jewish Man. And yet I am more happy being with this Irish guy who dispite his bad ways had been more kinder to my than anyone of men I had met in my own circle. David even ask to married me. no I did not say yes but I did not say how can I I am not ready to be tied down to anyone. Of course ther are other factors but that will be sove in due time. right now we just hed home and before we went back to our aprament we kissed each other goodbye and head our sparite way.

Dear Diary;

I am writing to because I really don’t know when in am going to write again. Yep it had been crazy here both at home and at my job. Dad had is not happy with me dating boy that is not my kind and my job had put a band of use talking to anyone who is against capitalism. This had something to do with a new law that would make it illegal to hair children. I am a bit mixs on this on the one hand I could understand that education is important but I love working and the money I bring had help my family a lot in fact I am working overtime in order to bring in more money for the family. Yet I am worried with if this new law pass will thsat put me out of work? David said not to worry about but I have to. I’m the little mama of the family and It’s my job to make sure my little brothers and sisters are well taken care of. And it is hard to do that if I am not bring home the bread. That when David kissed me and said you will think of something. I smile.; my opinion is always import to him and he show it. is one of the reason why I love him so much. Yes I love him, I am proud to say that. Well I have to go to work now but don’t worried I might have something else to say one I get back.

Ally Greenbush last entry July, 1938

By Jockerlee 77

Based On Park Slope Creator

JockerLee 77 & T-Tun Unusual Wordsmith III

2015 Manic Expression.com

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