Hello and welcome to In Too Deep, where I over-analyse a certain section of pop culture.

Now a while back (subjectively speaking, obviously) I posted a blog putting Harry Potter into the various other houses of Hogwarts. Well I feel like doing it again, but on a slightly different scale. How would the story play out if Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, Neville Longbottom and Luna Lovegood had all been put into different houses? Well lets find out.

Ron Weasley

Hufflepuff: In this universe Ron gets put into Hufflepuff. Since he’s still Harry’s first and thus best friend (and Harry has no concept of the wizarding world to start with) he and Harry still hang out between classes. However the friendship they could have formed never strengths as much as it could because, you know, spending nine months in the same room as a guy makes you better friends. So when it’s time for Harry to go hunt for the horocruxes Ron never goes with him. Instead it’s Neville and Hermione that do the journey and, because Neville is awesome, they do it in a few months. Still Ron leads a happy life and ends up marrying Hannah.

Ravenclaw: While this may seem odd lets not forget that Ron is really, really good at chess. And he’s often the man with the plan. So it makes sense that he’d be sorted into Ravenclaw. In this universe, forced to actually apply himself, he ends up becoming as smart as Hermione in many respects and gets pretty good grades. However, he and Harry just don’t stay as close friends due to the Houses getting in the way and Ron losing a lot of his carefree attitude he use to have. Again the horocrux hunt happens with Neville instead of Ron, with Ron becoming part of the ministry instead.

Slytherin: Again he is shown in the books to be cunning when needs to be, so not that far-fetched. Plus he gets pretty envious of Harry in the books, showing that he does have ambitions. Anyway in this universe he is bullied relentlessly for being a Weasley by both the Slytherins and his brothers. He either succumbs to the bullying and becomes depressed or traumatized… or he snaps and quickly becomes a master manipulator within the Slytherin house. Using his friendship with Harry (who would befriend him despite pressure from other houses) as a starting point he quickly manages to establish a gang to rival Malfoy’s and uses his power to crush out the competition. With this ruthless streak grown within him he becomes the Minster of Magic by the end.

Hermione Granger

Hufflepuff: In this universe Hermione ends up with a lot of friends, due to the innate goodness of Hufflepuffs. She continues to show off her smarts and helps Hufflepuff out a lot. However she never befriends Harry Potter and only looks at him from afar. In this reality Harry is joined with Neville and Ron, while she spends her time studying. However, she still creates S.P.E.W in this universe, but this time does it in such a way that benefits the House Elves (rather than trying to trick them into being free).

Ravenclaw: Now this is the closest to canon because Hermione admits that the Sorting Hat considered putting her in Ravenclaw, but ultimately chose Gryffindor. Now considering she obviously read up about Dumbledore and learned what house he was in, is it any surprise she subconsciously picked that one? Anyway the story’s the same as the last universe, except here Hermione doesn’t stand out as much. However, thanks to the competition with her fellow students she’s most happy in this universe and gets along with everyone else rather well. With this added competition she becomes a bright young star in the wizarding world.

Slytherin: Very unlikely, but had this happened Hermione would probably be influenced in a bad way by Draco. There’s a possibility that with a ‘Mudblood’ in his house Draco would be forced to re-examine his beliefs and wonder whether he’s justified in believing in them. As such he grows to befriend Hermione and use her intelligence to pass the classes, only for her in turn to use him to increase her political power. Maybe love will form, but that’s something for the fan fiction writers to decide.

Draco Malfoy

Hufflepuff: Draco decides to do the ultimate Slytherin thing and chose the most cunning route: Hide inside of Hufflepuff and plot from behind enemy lines. However the innate goodness of Hufflepuff gets to him and he finds himself being forced to confront and reject his old beliefs, becoming a better person in the process. His father disowns him, but he ends up making a comfortable living for himself in the end.

Ravenclaw: There’s no evidence Draco isn’t a smart guy, so lets pretend this happens. Faced with a more rational and logical house he becomes forced to shed his old beliefs and confront them properly, becoming a better person in the progress. Again his Dad disowns him, but in this reality he takes a job at the ministry and uses his powers for good.

Gryffindor: Draco is quite a brave fellow on the quiet, so lets presume this happens. He is forced into a house he doesn’t respect and either becomes bitter or grows up. Surrounded by Gryffindors he’s forced to hide his beliefs and eventually becomes somewhat friends with Harry Potter. Since Gryffindor wins the House Cup every year he feels good about that and rides on that success. At the end he’s a more noble person, but not necessarily a better one.

Neville Longbottom

Hufflepuff: While Neville is indeed brave, chances are he only got sorted into Gryffindor is because his parents were in it. If we’re honest he’s a far better Hufflepuff than anything else. And had he become a Hufflepuff he’d have probably been a lot happier in the long run. He’d be surrounded by people who love and care about him. He’d have far more self-confidence from not having to live in his parents shadow. He ends up marrying Hannah and lives a good life, while still being the badass that steps up to bat during the Year of Occupation at Hogwarts.

Ravenclaw: Really unlikely, yes, but a lot of Neville’s buffoonish comes from a lack of self-confidence. Take that factor away and he’s now a more interesting person. He’d be smarter and would do better in class. In fact he would probably end up becoming some sort of philosopher at the end of it. Same canon as the original text, just slightly different character.

Slytherin: He planned the Hogwarts Revolution, he’s clearly quite a cunning fellow. But if he’s put in Slytherin he would no doubt become the most badass mother lover that ever existed, effortlessly taking over the house politics of Slytherin and rising out on top. And I’m not just saying that solely because Neville Longbottom is the most badass character of the books and would clearly do a lot of awesome… but it is a big part of it, yes.

Luna Lovegood

Hufflepuff: Luna would probably enjoy being Hufflepuff because, since they’re such nice guys and girls, and thus wouldn’t be bullied as much as she was in Ravenclaw. Still just as cooky, but ultimately a happy girl by the end of the series. But would still probably be friends with Ginny and the rest of the gang by extension.

Gryffindor: Again, same as above. Less bullying, greater friends with Ginny, probably falls under Harry’s radar and becomes friend with her earlier by proxy. But she doesn’t really change all that much.

Slytherin: Honestly the best thing about Luna is that she exists far outside of her house, to the point where moving houses doesn’t change much about the character. As I’ve pointed out in this blog, moving the character into different houses changes them, but Luna is a somewhat static character in that regard. She stays firm despite the world changing around her. As such her being Slytherin wouldn’t make her any different to being Ravenclaw, Gryffindor or Hufflepuff.

So there you have it. My look at Harry Potter’s friends and enemies and how they’d change if they were put into different sleeping quarters. If you disagree with anything, or have anything to add, feel free to leave a comment. Till next time.

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